Gluten-free food – Tara Prana

I have a friend. A good friend, a lovely friend.

But I feel she doesn’t respect my way of eating.

Last night we went out for dinner with friends, to a pizza place. At the end of the evening I declared that the gluten free pizza was the worst I had had in a long time (It was truly like cardboard!).
Now to that comment, my friend, she could have said ‘that sucks’ or ‘that must be frustrating’ or ‘shame, our wheat one was was really nice’ or she could have just nodded and said …… nothing.

But my friend, she said this: ‘You should have eaten the other one then.’

I felt upset, like all the other times she says things like that.

But I smiled. I smiled and said ‘I couldn’t, it wouldn’t be worth it’ to which she asked directly, ‘Are you a coeliac?’.

I mumbled no, but that doesn’t mean I don’t suffer, and then trailed off because she wasn’t listening.

The truth is, I don’t know if I am a coeliac or not, because I have not had the full range of tests. Sure, I’ve had the blood test and a colonoscopy, but those do not actually detect coeliac disease. For that, I would need a laparoscopy, a camera from both ends.

My GP, who I respect, discouraged me from having this a while ago when I was still recovering. I understand why.

She said, ‘Tara, do we need a test to tell us you can’t eat gluten? We know how sick you get from eating gluten and grain. We saw it with our own eyes. Do you remember?’

Yes, I remember.

I remember that I went from 56kg to 48kg in a matter of months. I remember my ribs and hips stuck out and I felt too weak to walk normal places such as from the car. I remember that I would start to faint if I stood for too long. I remember that just taking my kids to the park was a huge struggle.

I remember that I could not keep any food in and needed to be within a few minutes of a toilet at all- I mean, AT ALL- times.
I remember that I was incredibly anxious if I needed to go to a new, unfamiliar place. For how would I know if there was a toilet, or where it even was? Would I get there in time?

I remember literally running to the toilet each morning, about five times, before I could even leave the house. This was tricky as I had a baby and a toddler at the time.

I remember that my iron levels got so low that I almost needed a blood transfusion. Instead I was subjected to fortnightly injections of iron and B vitamins in my behind, and had so many bruises that I could not sit back on the floor with my young children.

I feel like I lost a year of my life at that time. Not only a year of my own life but that precious year of my children’s life.
I was a shell of a person, a literal skeleton. I also lost my mind. All my marbles- gone.

So, to my friend: No actually, I do not know if I am a coeliac or not.

What I do know is that I now know my health. And my life. And my children’s lives.

A slice of ‘normal’ pizza cannot tempt me away from those precious, precious things that I have fought so hard to regain.

Don’t be confused- I send my friend love, not resentment. That is because we only know what we know. We only know our own experience, our own truth, our own lives. And that’s okay. I don’t need others to know my truths. The important thing is that I know them myself. After many years I now do, on many levels.

It would be nice though. 😉

How do you find other people’s approach to the way that you eat? Let me know in the comments.

Tara X

Do you remember, about five or so years ago, when Gluten-free menu options started to be seen on menus? When Gluten-free products started appearing on the supermarket shelves and not just in the local health food store? Around that time I was trialling a gluten-free diet (with success), but I was struggling with the attitudes that still existed, like ‘Doesn’t that taste awful?’, ‘Oh everything is fine in moderation, I say’ and the feeling that Gluten-free food was “weird food” (direct quote from my brother-in-law!).

How times have changed! These days, you will rarely find a restaurant that does not highlight on their menu which items are Gluten-free (GF), Vegan (VG) or Vegetarian (V). The ‘health food’ sections of the supermarkets are brimming with Gluten-free biscuits and sauces and breads and bars and flours and cake mixes. This little industry is a goldmine for producers. No-one blinks an eye if you say you are gluten-intolerant, as so many people realise that they are these days.

Five years later I feel that, in a way, I have evolved a little further in the food journey by embracing a grain-free/paleo lifestyle. I look back with retrospect at all those above mentioned gluten-free products that I spent my money on, that were highly processed and relied on a lot of sugar to enhance the taste. If you need to label things as weird I personally see Paleo as ‘less weird’ than Gluten-free, in that the focus is on real foods like meats, eggs, (some) fruits and vegetables as opposed to processed foods designed to substitute wheaten products. (*Of course we all know that grain-free products are automatically gluten-free).

So how funny to me to find myself in almost the same receiving position of others’ attitudes as I did over 5 years ago! I now get asked all kinds of things, such as ‘What on earth do you eat if you don’t eat grains??’, ‘Do you get hungry- how do you get full?’, and ‘What’s so wrong with grains?’, accompanied by statements like ‘Don’t you know your body NEEDS carbs?’, ‘ Paleo is just another fad’ and ‘Paleo food tastes like crap!’. (And yes, my ever-consistent brother-in-law likes to argue about the accuracy of our Paleolithic diet understanding and now also states that he is “intolerant to Gluten-free food”!)

What should my answer be to these question and statements ????

“No, meat and vegetables taste just fine thanks”.

“I know it is pretty extreme eating bacon and eggs for BREAKFAST, instead of cereal, but it’s really good. You should try it”.

Or perhaps I should just simply explain that I get heaps of carbs through my vegetable intake and that I feel full after every meal? That ‘Paleo’ simply means eating REAL FOOD?

Instead though, I just nod and smile and know that I only have to wait a little while for history to repeat- for it usually does.

Tara Prana

Mother. Teacher. Foodie. Friend.

Friends and intolerances….or intolerant friends?